scandalous sushi

After writing the blog about aphrodisiacs, I was thinking about some other ways people 'spice' food up. Not much time passed before I got to thinking about the craze people seem to have for eating food off others. Personally if I'm at a restaurant and I get a plate that looks kind of dirty or a spoon that has residue I am either slightly distraught or so extremely so that I ask for a replacement. Now I don't know about you but it sure is hard to tell if there is bacteria on someones skin... a lot more difficult than on a pristine white plate or some shiny silverware. Even the cleanest person, fresh out of the shower, touches the dirty doorknob on the bathroom door or uses a towel that could have fallen on the floor. Also, considering each day we shed thousands upon thousands of skin cells, one cannot be too sure how many they're ingesting when feeding off another persons torso. While I admit (grudgingly) that I probably eat other peoples skin cells that have fallen into my food all the time, I don't want to make absolutely sure that I get my fix everyday. Anyway, after stumbling along this topic I decided to do some research and find out if people simply enjoyed taking shots off hot women or if the fad was even more than that.

While I may face some serious opposition here, I hate sushi. I think that when pondering things that could make it even worse, I could not have possibly thought up eating it off a man wearing a speedo laying on a table...especially a man costing approximately $1100. That would seem too absurd to be even possible. This Japanese tradition is called Nyotaimori, meaning 'female body presentation.' There is also nantaimori, which is the male version. It's supposed to be a type of 'food play,' which brings the food closer the the temperature of the body. I guess that sometimes that could be good but I like my cold food cold and my hot food hot. I don't attempt to bring some cold food up to the temperature of my body because honestly I find that kind of weird. Another little issue I had with this practice was this: when I get warm...I get sweaty. I suppose having your food a little warmed up by some sexy woman/man could be a plus, but I don't think I would enjoy the added moistness.

While the idea in general is pretty exotic I would have to say that the laws governing it are pretty ridiculous as well. The body must be shaved, for the presence of pubic hair is sexual. Hmm, I'm pretty sure the lack of any clothing and the implementation of food arranged on the persons body is pretty sexual in itself. I especially find that this is the case with the food being as temporary as it is... in the beginning the food is strategically located in order to best cover certain areas of the body which are frequently considered obscene, though after hungry customers dive in such cannot be expected as the end result.













In some countries the laws are slightly different governing the practice, as China has banned it on moral grounds. (Morals??! Who needs them?) Other countries only permit it when the 'plate' is wrapped in clingfilm to prevent the skin and food from actually touching. (How will I get my fix of skin cells? :( ) Regardless, it's pretty ridiculous.